my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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