Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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