bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize