i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize