You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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