You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize