I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize