I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
im drinking this country out of the recession.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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