Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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