I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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