So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize