im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
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She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
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just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
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