we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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