If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize