If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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