Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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