Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize