To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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