Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
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grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
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Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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