oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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