My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I just found a bag of teeth...
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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