After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize