So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
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You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
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Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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