i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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