There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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