he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize