I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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