I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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