after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
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