There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Randomize