You smell like stripper and shame
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize