I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
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