So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize