I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I cannot find my penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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