He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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