He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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