i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize