There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize