we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize