Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize