At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
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