My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize