So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
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