i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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