if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize