That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
A bitchslap is in order.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Randomize