I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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