Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize