now i know why i became what i already was.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize