Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
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Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
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I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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